This space has been empty for far too long.
I took a break from blogging while I got myself together. I’m back and things are better.
As so many of you know, I’m a firm believer that if you don’t like the way things are going in your life, then you owe it to yourself to make some changes.
Month after month, I found myself showing up to a job that made me unhappy. While my work was often personally rewarding, it also required long hours, extensive travel, and offered little in return.
I was constantly away from home on holidays and weekends. There was no career path, and after a bit, working began to feel like treading water.
After a bit, I began to get bored.
But mostly, I missed my family.
As time dragged on, I saw my family less and less and it began to wear on me.
In fact, I would probably still be sitting in an airport right now, except for the fact that two things happened to change my trajectory. First, my best friend called and told me we were traveling to Oprah’s “Seize Your Life” event in Los Angeles.
At the Oprah event, we met some amazing people including: John Gray, Gabrielle Bernstein, and Glennon Doyle.
Listening to these inspirational leaders chat about uncertainty, love and momentum caused me to consider the things that were holding me back.
Additionally, my best friend had written a successful book about Seizing Your Life and I began to think about the things she was suggesting to audiences as she toured the country promoting her book. I began wondering why I wasn’t doing the things she talked to others about.
When we returned from L.A., I caught up with some friends in Scottsdale. I spent some time by the pool chatting with one of my old friends, Jon.
Jon was game changer number two.
The good thing about chatting with an old friend is that old friends know you best. They’re the people you can’t lie to, even when you’re lying to yourself.
I pride myself on living an authentic life. And as I sat there talking to Jon, I realized that I had to stop making excuses and start living authentically again.
I couldn’t even look him in the face and make an excuse for my unhappiness: my job was a draining, dead end.
In addition to my professional unhappiness, my personal life left a lot to be desired. Mostly because I wasn’t around to grow or invest in it. And my child, who I love more than life itself, was going to college in 36 months.
If I didn’t do something soon I was going to miss out on everything.
I knew that I couldn’t immediately quit my job because I was responsible for the launch of two important projects. In hindsight, if there’s anything that I’m proud of, it’s that even in the midst of my misery, I maintained my integrity and completed those projects.
In an effort to wrap up and move on, I set a deadline for myself and held myself accountable. I submitted my resignation and I focused on delivering those priority projects.
Resigning from my job was difficult.
I left a job that was comfortable and familiar. I knew what success looked like and which people on my team could help get work done.
The people I worked with were awesome.
I made decent money and received great benefits. Still, the misery I brought home (when I was home) far outweighed the benefits. And I felt like I was missing everything. Something had to change.
After quitting my job, I had some time on my hands.
I visited friends and did some projects around the house.
With more time on my hands I began to take a critical look at my life and started fixing the things that were broken or could tolerate a little improvement. In short, I started showing up in my personal life.
The transition from being absent to being present wasn’t easy.
In fact, being present was a lot harder than I expected.
With more time on my hands I began to realize that some of the people in my life–people who presented themselves as having similar values, and who preached the gospel of “authenticity” and friendship to anyone who would listen, were in fact, completely full of it.
And they weren’t really friendly at all.
That was devastating.
But uncertainty is ok. And while change can be uncomfortable, it can also be transformational too.
While managing all of this chaos and transition, I learned something much more important. Something I already knew.
God shows up.
I love to talk about how God puts people in your path. It’s something I firmly believe, and have experienced time and time again.
And it’s the lesson that has carried me through.
When I was worried, wondering if I did the right thing in quitting my job, my old boss called the next week and invited me to lunch–thanking me for all my hard work.
I was grateful for that lunch. It meant a lot to know that I had his support when I chose me over my career.
It wasn’t all roses, though.
I also learned that not everyone who is in your face is your friend. And while you can try to show some people compassion, in the end, the only thing you can really show a low functioning person is the door.
My real friends more than made up for it though. They took the day off work and had a fun boho birthday party with me–a party for the ages–complete with a vision board session, a fortune teller and henna artist.
That party was the ultimate pick me up.
It reminded me that sometimes when you are unsure or your decisions, you just need to shut up, let go and let God, because He will put people in your path who will reassure you.
My friends even helped me find a job that doesn’t require a lot of travel.
In short, I’ve been committing myself to living the life that I talk about in real life and online too.
Being that person takes a lot of work. And a lot of courage. And it requires so much support and commitment.
To thrive, you need your village.
And while it’s not always easy, it’s always worth it.
I’m planning to return to blogging and recommit to storytelling. Blogging has always been a fun way for me to share my life (the good and the bad) and build meaningful connections with people in person and online.
I’m looking forward to blogging again–and thank those of you who supported my mini sabbatical!